How to convince a spouse to undergo marriage counseling
// December 8th, 2009 // News / Society
One of the toughest problems that people can have is marriage problems. Whether you are a couple just starting or have been married for many years.It would still be hard to go through it. It really affects not just the couple but other aspects of our lives.Their kids can also be affected.Their work can also be affected.So, how can one convince his/her other half to undergo marriage therapy? This article hopes to answer that.
Now you may be wondering why you would need to convince the spouse? Because it is proven time and time again in my San Diego marriage counseling practice that a lot of times only one person wants help.Those would be the times when it is hard to convince the couple that they really need help.If that is the case then you must have the know how on how to convince them that your relationship is in dire need of help.Of course it would still be up to them to decide if they still want to save their realtionship.If they both decide to go on with their lives separated from each other then nothing can really help.
So when one person comes to me needing help as a San Diego marriage therapist I try to come up with ways to show the other person they need help.And showing how serious the problem is is one way that I convince them that they need counseling.I try to show them that their problems as a couple also affect their whole family.And I also tell them that other areas of their lives are also affected by their problems.Usually, that woudl be enough to convince them to undergo counseling.That would be if they still want to reconcile with their other half and patch things up.
Now doing couples counseling San Diego there are times when the other person doesn’t want to fix the relationship. At that point the person that does want help needs to know what to do.But what can one still do if the other one has already decided that he/she wants out.You can point out what they are doing wrong in the relationship but if they do not listen then what can one do more.
[...] See the article here: How to convince a spouse to undergo marriage counseling | Hot … [...]
WHAT IF ONLY ONE PERSON IS WILLING TO COME TO COUNSELING?
When your significant other is unwilling to come in for help for your relationship, it may be even more important for us to talk. By waiting for your partner to be ready, you are placing the future of your relationship in their hands alone. As a family systems therapist, I believe that that when only one person comes to therapy, a small change in that person can impact the couples relationship. If you are sincere about wanting the best possible chance to rescue your relationship, there are some steps you can take to insure a positive outcome.
HERE IS WHAT I CAN TEACH YOU EVEN IF YOUR PARTNER DOES NOT COME IN FOR PSYCHOTHERAPY:
1. How to influence your partner in a positive way when you talk with him/her.
2. How to better understand the negative cycles in your relational dynamic even if your partner will not speak to you.
3. Learn how to deal with your partner more effectively when they “stonewall” and won’t speak to you.
4. Get support in a challenging situation by learning how to hold on to yourself and manage yourself more effectively in trying situations.
5. How to better support your children in a home that is marked by conflict.
6. Learn new strategies to handle specific and difficult situations like a partner’s distancing from you by putting up walls, infidelity, anger, addiction, alcoholism, internet addiction, or in-law problems.
IF YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS SUFFERING, DO NOT WAIT FOR YOUR PARTNER TO AGREE TO COME TO COUNSELING!
While you are waiting for them to come to therapy, things may worsen and rebuilding your relationship will only become more difficult.
As you learn to deal more effectively when your partner won’t join in the therapy effort, there are two things that often occur:
First, many partners notice change and they respond to it positively. They then become more willing to communicate.
Secondly, your partner may become less defensive and/or critical, because they observe the positive difference that counseling has provided. At this point, they may be willing to join you in couples counseling.
I offer very affordable rates and evening hours. Do call me for a complimentary phone consultation at 619 9906203. And even better, check out my web site at http://www.Cunninghamtherapy.com
Thrive, Don’t Just Survive! Call me today.